Ahhhh Geez, Do I HAVE To?

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I’ve been doing lots of deep thinking lately, and I’ve come to a conclusion, procrastinators are not lazy, they (we) are just tired of being responsible all the time.

Think about all the stuff you have to do in just one day.  For me, I have to get up before everyone else,  force a teenager out of bed way too early, get dressed, fix the teenager’s breakfast, drive her to school after asking her if she has all her stuff, drive home, wake up the younger one, make sure he dresses in clothing that is clean and not too big for him, fix his breakfast, lunch and make sure he has all his stuff, drive him to school, and then go to work myself if I have a sub job.  During the day, I do all the teacher-y stuff, then I have to go pick up the boy, then pick up the girl, come home, make sure they do homework, have a balanced dinner so they stay healthy, make sure everyone takes a shower and gets to bed at a decent time, again, so they stay healthy.  In between all that, I have to do bills, laundry, clean the house, run errands, and do stuff for my aging mother.  My husband travels a lot, so he is only available to help on a part-time basis.  I WILL give him credit for being a good husband and Dad though, and he really steps up when he is home.  Just the basics of living is exhausting.  I am exhausted just from writing about it, so this leads me to my problem with procrastination.

Some things, like going to school and work HAS to be done at a particular time and so cannot be procrastinated over.  OTHER things like house cleaning, laundry and exercising so I stay healthy, don’t have to be done on a schedule.  Those things can be fit in when it is convenient.  Problem is, I find that it is not exactly convenient for me to do that stuff.  Ever.  I have books to read and books to write.  I have friends I want to talk to and a husband I like to hang out with.  I like my kids and I like to spend time with them too.  I enjoy the computer and I like to watch a little tv.  I get tired of being responsible ALL THE TIME.  I am tired of being a good girl.  I don’t want to do anything particularly bad or illegal or anything, I just don’t feel like doing everything I am SUPPOSED to do, all the time.  So I procrastinate.

I sit on my behind and read when I should be doing laundry, so the laundry piles up and up and up and then I find myself spending three days getting it caught up.  I play games on Facebook, and look up to discover that I forgot the run the vacuum or start dinner.  I sit on my swing listening to the Dean Martin station on Pandora radio, and realize that it is time to go get the kids and I forgot to put the laundry in the dryer and I’m behind again.  I get watching Paranormal State on Netflix and delay going to the park for my walk and by the time I get motivated to go, it’s too hot or too late.  I get in a conversation with a friend on the phone and run out of time to sit and work on my book.  Again.

This doesn’t happen everyday obviously, because I am generally too busy being responsible mom to just do what I want, but it DOES happen.  I’ve decided to stop fighting it.  I am realizing that when I get distracted and procrastinate, it’s because I am tired and too filled up with everyday responsibilities, and procrastinating is my unconscious way of taking a break.  So PROCRASTINATORS UNITE!!  Sit on your butt and daydream, or take a drive, or read a book. or work on a craft project.  When you were a little kid, that was called “playing” and everyone wanted you to do it, because it’s good for you.  Who decided that grown-ups aren’t allowed to play?  I don’t agree with that person, so I am going to ignore them from now on.  Now where did I leave my book…

Have a great day and be kind to one another :-)

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